Birth Story for Vera Basil

This is the birth story for Vera Basil Born at home Monday, March 11, 2013 at 4:50-53am...

Husband and I woke up at 8:50am Sunday morning, and took a few moments to ourselves before our daughter Sonja woke up.

Sunday is my yoga morning.  After our alone time, I got up and started getting ready for my 10:30 class.  I went to the bathroom and noticed a mucus discharge {with a tint of blood}  I thought it could be the mucus plug, but last time it all came out in one chunk and this was not as big and more gooey than I expected.

I decided to go ahead and go to yoga, although I noticed I was having contractions, much like the practice ones I'd been having in the evening for the past few weeks.  The only difference was this was not the evening.  I decided to continue with class and just took child's pose when I got uncomfortable.  I didn't want to miss the beautiful day outside nor the outdoor practice.

Bakasana at 39 weeks

Contractions or Surges, as I usually call them, were mild all day.  They ranged in the 2-4 pain range, on a scale from 1-10.  They were coming every 10-20 minutes.  I sat down and did our taxes while Husband and Sonja went to a spring training game with his father and brother.  I told him I'd call if they got real active but they stayed mild for a while.

Around 5pm I noticed more mucus plug (again slightly bloody).  My parents came for dinner after I told them I thought tonight would be the night.  I called my sister, as she was planning on being the photographer of the whole event.  During dinner and that evening the surges increased to 4 on pain scale, and I knew they weren't going to stop.  I just didn't know how long they would last.


I texted our Midwife at 9:41 and she called right after.  After talking with me she decided to come over and hang out until I got active. My parents ended up going home after 10pm ish, since our midwife was there and she was pretty confident it would be a little while.

While hanging out my sister and sister in law offered to help me make my postpartum yoni healing pads.

Around 11pm I decided to lay down with Sonja to get her to sleep.  During that time I had a few surges in the 5-6 pain scale.

Once she was asleep, {about 12 midnight} I headed out into the kitchen to talk to birth team.  There were more surgest in the 5-6 pain range but we talked through the fact I was scared for it to get real and once I just accept it's happening I could hurry the process up.  We agreed I could keep it pushed off for a while, until the birth hormornes really kicked in and forced it to happen.  I knew I had to just jump off that cliff but I was still scared of it.

At 1am ish I decided to get in the shower and use my birth ball.  Once I was in there, there was no pain. I thought they stopped! I stayed in there for a while, wondering if I couldn't feel them if they were still there... they were.  Once the warm water ran out I got out of the shower and laid down on the bed over a stack of pillows.  My sweet friend Diane rubbed my back and so did Husband.  They were both such a great support team.

Husband kicked everyone else out of room shortly after my shower.  He mentioned he wanted this sacred experence to be between the two of us.  And while I knew that was sweet, I really just wanted to not be in pain,  I didn't care who was rubbing my back as long as it was being done in the right spot at the right time.  It's really hard to explain to someone what to do when you're entering labor land and a fellow woman usually knows what to do better than a sweet husband.  But it was his birth too so I let him rub my back until about 3:30am.

The surges started to get so unbearable that I was screaming.  I woke up the whole household, many of whom had just fallen asleep.  My midwife's assistant, Danielle, came in to check on fetal heart tones and I rested as much as I could between surges.  It was probably a 7 on my pain scale and I noticed that my yell was primal with hints of grunting {indicative of pushing}.   Shell, my midwife, came in to check on me.  She laid beside me.  It started to become unbearable in any position.

She suggested Skylar check me. She said, I don't think he'll have to go very far, sometime like, "My thought is there should be a head in the vault."

He checked, and said he did feel a head.  But I asked her to check again because I felt like I was pushing without purpose. No progression. From pushing. She checked and said there was about a centimeter of cervix in the way. I was pulling it down with each push, instead of pushing it out of the way or waiting until it moved out of the way.  She helped to guide it out of the way, as I pushed and relaxed my abdomen I felt it slip over the baby's head.  There was a sense of relief/release.

Somewhere during that time Sonja woke up, she sleeps in the same room as us and must have heard me screaming.  She was so sweet and happy to watch.  She was holding my hand and loving me.  But I had one really awful surge and I screamed a little too loud which scared her.  As soon as I saw the tears I apologized   The surge was over and I was trying to calmly tell her I was okay and that the yelling helped it not hurt.  I gave her a kiss and so did her daddy.  He asked her if she wanted to go play with her grandparents in the living room and she said yes.  Off she went.

Once the head was in the canal, I was able to relax for a second. Shell told me to take deep breathe for baby {after I asked why and she explained fetal heart tones dropped way low and I needed to relax and allow baby to recover after such a powerful surge.  This is pretty normal and it's how fast baby recovers from such a situation that indicates what actions need to be taken}. My surges slowed down but were intense. Baby's heart rate recovered fine.

The surges gave me a few breaks during pushing.  I was able to ask for coconut water. I tried to consciously eat and drink because I was so tired I wanted to keep my energy up. I drank on my "breaks" and allowed myself to fully relax.

I was pushing so hard I peed.  Like all over the bed, actually on towels on the bed.  I tried to control it but I ended up pushing so hard I was pooping and peeing each time.  My support team happily cleaned it up before Skylar took over.  With Sonja's birth I was well cleared from a day of slow labor, this time was slightly quicker.  After a few tries of controlling it, I told them sorry, but I was just going to keep doing it.  They grabbed extra towels to put under me and all was fine.  Sometime in that mess I felt a gush, not pee.  I was sort of bummed for a second when I realized my water broke {no caul birth for me}.  But I was just ready to be done, I didn't really care and I was impressed with my body and baby for holding on that long!

Shell suggested if I needed the encouragement, I could feel inside to find the head and see how close I was. I DID need that and I felt the head push to the surface and slip back in once but on the next surge I was able to bring it to the surface and hold and push through. I could feel the bones of cheeks passing through. Once the head was out, I relaxed slightly through the next break and slowly pushed the shoulders and abdomen out. Husband was catching the baby. he had this beautiful baby half out and she looked at him and took her breathe but she was still in me.  He said, "I still don't know if it's a boy or girl..."

I can't believe Husband is "letting" me post this photo, but you can see her half in half out!

Shell told him something and I said "Don't touch her!" I didn't want him to tug, pull or anything. But she was explaining how to remove the cord around her neck.

With the next push I was able to get her all the way out.  "It's a girl," he said.  The whole delivery from head to toe was 4:50-4:53am.  When asked, between first breathe or toes out, I decided toes out.  She wasn't fully born until ALL the way out so her official birth time on her birth certificate says 4:53am.

Once she was out, I yelled, "Sonja" and everyone came rushing in.

We allowed the cord to stop pulsing and I delivered the placenta.  After a while of establishing breastfeeding we clamped and cut the cord.

She weighed 7lbs 12oz and was 19inches long.  13 and 1/4 inches head {a whole inch smaller than Sonja's!}

And here I am after 19 hours of natural labor with my Blue Corn Hot Chocolate {and placenta-couldn't even taste it} made by my midwife.  And on that note, I felt much much better emotionally and physically than I did after Sonja's birth.  So as gross as it might be I highly recommend it!

-Jenn

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How to make a Silkscreen {A DIY Project; Drawing Technique NOT Photo Emulsion Technique}

I really wanted to utilize my silk screen knowledge to make shirts for my midwife and her assistants.  Not so much becuase I wanted them to look like staff or anything, but because I thought it would be clever if I could get them a gift to remember my birth but also if they wear it to another birth it would still be funny,  I designed these in Illustrator and printed on regular paper.  

Here's what you'll need:

Silk Screen {you can make your own if you have a wood frame, and "silk" available at most craft and art stores}.

Screen Filler {I use speedball brand, but I'm sure you can find other brands online if desired}

Sharpie or permanent marker

Shirts to print on

Fabric Silk Screening Ink

Squeegee

Packing Tape 

Small and Large Paint Brushes

Print out the image you wish to draw.  Black and White only, NO GRAY.

Place print out UNDER silk screen as pictured and begin tracing the image.

Once complete with tracing remove and recycle print out, you won't need it again.

From the other side it will look backwards or a mirror image.

Next you'll need the screen filer and small paint brush

Using the small brush fill in all the tiny details, leave the area you want to print untouched.

Make sure after the first layer of screen filler, you go back in and fill in any holes you see when held up to the light.

After 2 or 3 coats of screen filler you should have a complete screen.

Using a larger brush fill in the larger areas.

This is what my screen looked like once I was complete with the screen filler.

Then, I used packing tape to tape around all of the edges so there was no space for the ink to leak through the edges.

Above is the ink after squeegeed onto the screen onto the shirt.

ALWAYS test the first print onto paper, so you don't waste a shirt.

If you missed any holes, ink may escape onto the fabric, you'll want to waste paper not a shirt.

Clean and fill in any holes and allow to dry then retest. 

Once all holes are completely filled you're free to print!  

Happy Silk Screening!
Jenn

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Pregnancy Round 2 {31 & 32 Weeks}

31 weeks and I finally feel pregnant.  I'm huge.  I seriously can't imagine getting bigger.  So, I'm a little freaked out about that.  Thankfully, I've only gained about 20lbs. which is a huge relief {I gained over 50 with Sonja}.  I've also updated my wardrobe to include 2 brand new maternity pants.  And just when I ordered them an offer on my midwife's community facebook page showed up with an offer for 2 free used pairs as well.  So I grabbed those too!  Now, I've got almost a weeks worth of elastic banded pants!

This week, I woke up with my leg "asleep", which freaked me out.  I mean, normally, I wouldn't care, but I'm trying to avoid edema and I want to make sure my blood flow is awesome while I'm sleeping.  In my Pilates for Pregnancy book the whole 3rd trimester is dedicated to exercises to keep ankles and feet from swelling.  That and our nightly walks should keep me in the clear.  Last time, I swelled up right before Sonja's birth and I'd like to keep it away for as long as possible this time as well.

Oh an did you catch that?  WALKS?! We've actually been going these past two weeks.  And if we don't walk, it's only because I worked out or did yoga that day!  A huge improvement and something really important in preparing for birth.  So proud of our little family for making the effort with me.

Other noticeable differences in this pregnancy, compared to my last, are the showers.  I actually want to shower!  Last time, it was forced and I felt like I was going to pass out just being in the hot water, this time I need it.  I need to let my stomach stretch in the shower every night before lotion and oils in order to be comfortable for bed. Also, I've noticed this baby likes to spread out differently in my tummy.  S/he likes to push out on both my left and right side at the same time.  Sonja never did that.  It's not pleasant and I'm hoping that s/he is in the right position {we should know within the next few weeks, when the midwife feels for the head and such}

Week 32 has been a shopping frenzy.  I bought a bunch of stuff we needed for the house, and I'm blaming it on nesting.  I also finally created a "registry." Which is mostly just a list of the diapers I'd like to add to our collection.  With Sonja, we used cloth.  And I tried lots of brands, some organic and some not.  This time, since I've gifted most of her non-organic ones away to my new mama friends {almost everyone I know is cloth diapering! Yay, for the environment}, I'm asking friends if they're going to get us anything for our baby sprinkle {we already had a "shower" for Sonja} to get us organic diapers.  Best of all, I found a LOCAL baby boutique with tons of organic stuff and a huge range of cloth diapers.  Have you checked out Zoolikins?  Not only do they have a brick and mortar store, they have a super user friendly website!

Also, Bees!  can we just take a moment to appreciate the bees?! They've been all over me this week.  They've been my pregnancy animal this pregnancy {with Sonja it was peacocks}.  While at the park this week, one landed on my hand walked around {and tickled me} before flying away, and the same day another one tried to kiss my ear while out back with Sonja.  I guess this would be more interesting if you all knew my baby sprinkle theme and or saw the invitations I just sent out, but I'm saving that for when I share the party in a separate post.

Friday, we had an appointment with our Midwife.  She says baby is in a good position, and "big" and sturdy.  And when I asked about breech {a slight concern I have this time around} she assured me after my birth with Sonja I could handle anything.  She also mentioned that she'd like for Husband to catch the baby.  And, that, you know? she'll be there, but she's probably not going to do anything.  {Unless I need her to}.  Which is cool that she has that confidence in me.  We talked about my hopes for having a new bathtub by the time of the birth, but now it's probably not going to happen.  I didn't know if getting a play pool outside was worth it, since I'd have to heat and change the water {or someone else would}, and would I really be outside all that much?  Last time, I stayed on the toilet when labor got really intense because I was going to the bathroom every few seconds {not exaggerating!}.  She laughed at me, and reminded me I'm not the type of woman to sit still in a tub and labor for a few hours anyway {which is SO true}.  So, we're still thinking about our "plan."

I told her my plan was to have the baby fall out.  I've been trying to walk more, I went to the gym and "ran" for a few minutes and since I know I can do that now. I'm going to keep adding sprints to my treadmill routine.  And maybe I can sprint this baby out of me.  I should clarify, when I say run, I mean go fast for a little over a minute, then resume walking.  I can't really run all that long when I'm not pregnant.  So, it's exciting I can still do even just a minute at a time.  Instead of running I've always been a brisk walker at high inclines.  I've also been doing my yoga twice a week.  Which helped so much with knowing what position my body needed last time I was in labor.

I was sort of freaking out that I had 8 more weeks to go, and that I feel huge and uncomfortable.  But, as I'm starting off week 33 I am feeling a little more accepting of 8 more weeks and using this time to prep. all the food and supplies for our birth.

I'll update you all again soon & thanks for following along on my second pregnancy journey!
-Jenn

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My Thoughts on Hospital Births

I don't think hospitals are bad.
I think hospital policies are bad.
I don't think O.B.s are bad.
I think O.B.'s policies are bad.
Anything that can not differentiate between the needs of the whole and the needs of an individual, and the risks of the whole and risks of the individual are bad.

The midwifery model of care understands the needs of each of the individual women and the safety of both mother and child.

O.B.s have a lot to learn from midwives; compassion, normalcy of birth, trust of a woman's body.  And Midwives are lucky to have the resources of O.B.s for higher risk pregnancies; more fetal monitoring options, suctions and forceps devices for complicated deliveries, and cesarian sections for moms who NEED them (only, maybe 5% of women truly need them. source.).

I think every woman should be well educated on her birth choices and options, risks and success rates of her birth plan along with a well established support system for immediately following a birth.  My understanding of O.B.s and Hospitals is that, they do not fully inform their patients of risks and success rates of various procedures in the same way a midwife would.  I know my O.B. experience resulted in a total of 20 minutes out of 3 hour appointment with the actual O.B.. Whereas, my midwife appointments are about and hour long with 100% of the time with the midwife discussing concerns, risks and success rates of various topics regarding birth.

I think misconceptions need to be addressed along with fears about women's bodies.

From various conversations I've overheard...
A 10 pound baby is big but healthy and completely do-able by vaginal birth, contrary to one woman's opinion.
Working out does NOT create a larger baby. On the contrary, it strengthens the uterus for a faster recovery and less of a chance of bleeding to death via hemorrhage.  Also, repeat cesarian sections are more dangerous than vaginal births after cesarian.  In regards, to hemorrhage as opposed to uterine rupture, women are less likely to have a uterine rupture than serious hemorrhage with repeat c-sections. (source 1, 2, 3)
Drugs and medications are NOT the only, nor most successful, pain relief options for laboring women. A doula is a professionally trained labor suport person and known to reduce the use of drugs and epidurals for laboring women.  And there are many more positions, procedures {like acupuncture, massage and TENS}, and techniques to elevate pain.
Pain in labor IS purposeful.  It allows the mother to know how far along her body is progressing.  It is a message from the body to the brain that something important is about to happen.  It is beneficial to the mother's mental health to be present in the pain {as opposed to "checked out" via drugs} to bond with the baby, the baby's birth is what stops the pain.
Women will often defend their doctors by saying they {the O.B.} knows what's best.  But what is best isn't being restricted to a limited diet during one of the most energy using experiences of a woman's life.  It's neither safe, nor easy, nor comfortable.  Yes, if someone happens to NEED a caesarian they will need anesthesia and they may vomit.  But, in any other EMEREGENCY surgery the patient is rarely rushed in with an empty stomach.  That is just one of the examples where the policies for the whole, restrict the needs of an individual.

In short, I think each birth is unique and each requires unique circumstances.  Unfortunately, I've yet to see or hear of an Arizona hospital that is truly mama and baby friendly. I think each birth choice is completely the choice of the mother, sorry dads!  I just wish women were consistently informed of true risks and I wish more often than not they would choose the safest choice for themselves and their babies as opposed to what someone tells them is the easiest yet safe enough option.

That is my problem with hospitals; their myth of ease and safety.  What women compromise for safety and ease is actually safety and comfort.

All birth is work, all births are difficult and to pretend otherwise is setting up a mom for defeat.  Wether it's postpartum depression or the difficult recovery of an unnecessary surgery, the effects of a emotionally painful birth are much worse than the pain of childbirth.  No women gets an easy birth unless, maybe, she's worked hard during her pregnancy to ensure one.  So, when I hear women talk about their choices for a hospital or planned c-section; because "it's going to be easier {because of drugs or lack of pushing}" I just want to shake them.  They have no idea what they're in for.  Even if they've experienced the process before, they're still at risk for all the complications of their choices, choices few of them have been fully informed of.

So, to clarify though all my rambling; my problems with hospitals are their myth of ease, myth of informed consent, myth of choice.  If hospitals can take note of these concerns and rewrite policies, I think we'd have a lot more happy mamas.  I also think if you've found a hospital that supports you and your choices, no matter what, you're lucky; and I'd love to know where these places are!  Please, share them in the comments.  I also know mom's who are thankful for the hospitals that helped make their delivery a safe one.  I know I would/will be thankful for a hospital if an emergency transfer is necessary with my next baby.  But I do not plan on starting off at one, for all the reasons listed above and more.  I think for a healthy family, the home is where a birth should be, and hospitals, like for everything else, should be reserved for emergencies and complications only.

Disagree with me? leave a comment.  I'd love to hear other opinions. I know I ramble sometimes, but I just needed to share MY thoughts on hospitals and why I don't want to birth in one.  I hope anyone reading this understands I'm not judging a women who chooses a hospital birth, I just hope she's being treated with respect and care, like every mom-to-be deserves.

-Jenn

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Pregnancy Round 2 {5.5 Weeks}

I'm not one for being patient, and I'm not one for keeping secrets.  Sonja, actually, said to me last night, "Mommy has big mouth." I think it was because, I told her to take a little bite, because she has a little mouth.  But that's not the point.  Is it?

The point is we're pregnant.

5.5 weeks pregnant to be exact. 

Now, if you know anything about my thoughts on pregnancy; you know I'm a firm believer in waiting until 12 weeks to tell anyone.  So, why am I telling you all here?  Since, I already have baby and she's happy and healthy, I'm less superstitious this time.

With my Cupcake, I was all, "if I sit this way, am I going to hurt her?"  

"if I do too much cardio am I going to have a miscarriage?"

"if I sleep on my back or tummy am I going to cut off her circulation?"

"if I tell anyone, god/goddess/fate will show me, I better not jinx it!"

This time, I'm not so worried about it.  I'm really going with the flow.  I'm excited, that I know what I'm doing this time.  I already budgeted for this, because I knew it was a possibility {we pay our midwife out of pocket.  Once we get insurance involved, they start telling me what I can and can't do with my body} and I'm prepared to buy a new car once baby gets here, since two car seats won't fit safely in the car we have now.

I also know that by sharing the news early this time around, I have the physical and metal support of the people around me.  The first trimester is the HARDEST for me. or at least it was last time.  Each pregnancy is different, but since I've already experienced a few quick waves of queasyness, I'm sure I'll get hit with a few "bad" days.  And this time I will have more support for those moments since everyone is in the loop.

Now, you might also be thinking {if you know me in real life, or if you've read this blog for a while}, "I thought you were going to wait a while? I thought you only wanted to birth one baby." Those thoughts are still true.  

I wanted to wait 2 more years before getting pregnant again, but there was a tiny opening in my life plan that allowed for us to get pregnant right now!  So, for our anniversary weekend we didn't follow natural planning guidelines, we just did what we wanted.  This timing allows for me to be postpartum for Emily's wedding, meaning dress shopping and wedding planning and assisting won't be inconvenienced.  Baby will be 7-8 months old when we go to Europe in 2013, an age I'm very comfortable with for both the plane ride, and for baby wearing around all the beautiful cities.  Our big move to Hawaii was slightly postponed, instead of 4 years it's looking like 6 because of some business opportunities, here, for Husband.  So, having baby number 2 now, will make him or her a good age for the move.  Sonja and new baby {which she's convinced will be a sister} will be a "perfect" 2.5 years apart, an age I've heard is great for bonding and closeness as they get older.  And I get to birth with my midwife here in phoenix, which makes me really happy as opposed to trying to find one in Hawaii when we get there, where midwifery is not licensed the same {or at all, if I recall incorrectly}.

As far as only wanting to birth one, but adopt more... my thoughts are the same.  I really, really didn't want to deal with morning sickness (notice the book in the photo?), wardrobe limitations, nor swollen feet.  But my birth experience was really good, and I found myself telling Husband moments after, "That wasn't as bad as everyone told me it would be." {and just to be clear, it wasn't a happy go lucky orgasmic birth.  It was a real, fucking painful, birth, I just expected it to get worse, but then, it was over}.  I also have some over population issues, I was mentally processing.  Like, why should we have more babies; where there are already too many and too many without homes?  Then, I heard from one of my favorite sources, that actually, it's not so much an over population issue; as much as an over consumption issue.  So, as long as everyone listens and doesn't drown my home in another dose of baby toys or unnecessities, we'll be fine.  I would still love to adopt a few more, but that's a lot to think about right now and a lot of money we don't have.  It also sort of feels like buying a baby, unfortunately due to the legal process involved.  So, we'll cross that bridge when we get there.  

For now, I'm excited about growing this baby, sharing the early pregnancy stories, documenting the whole process, with all of you here and enjoying time with my only-child-for-now.

Happy Pregnancy Following!

-Jenn

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Anniversary 2012 {Staycation}

Husband and I celebrated our four year anniversary this weekend by staying at the Hotel Valley Ho, here in Phoenix, well, technically, Scottsdale.  It was super fun, and our first baby free night since Cupcake was born!  Can you believe she's slept in bed with us for the past 21 months?! She had a great time with her uncle Wayne and aunt Gretchen.  And had fun too...

Husband opening his gift box.

I booked this place strictly because of that tub.

I like that the side of this building reminds me of the sprinkles we saw at A.J.s 

We stopped at P.F. Chang's for some happy hour snacks before our real date.  I thoroughly enjoyed my Asian Pear Mojito.

I forgot to pack my brush! BUT, was somehow able to braid my hair anyway.

All dressed up for our real date!  Dress complements of Desert Gypsy Mama!

We tried Stingray for the first time.  A little loud for a romantic date, but the Sushi was good and the sake was even better!

On the walk back to our hotel we passed a ton of art galleries in Old Town Scottsdale.

I loved this giant head!

So, remember that tub?! This was probably my favorite feature of our room.

Who doesn't love a "Mood" light?!

Before.

After.

I ordered the Brioche lemon french toast with berries and Husband had some coffee.

They brought this adorable flower with the food too.

Not the BEST brioche I've ever had, but close!

I love these cabanas with mirrors that look like windows!

photo credit: Husband.

I thought it would be good time to plan some lessons and update my schedules...

I may or may not have fallen asleep instead.

And that was our weekend, hope you had a great one too!

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